Update September 2019: I’ve created quote and Bible memes that I share on my Instagram page and, eventually, post to this site.
In the United States today, we live in a world of catch phrases, soundbites, and bumper-sticker ethics. While such a system has many drawbacks, it does allow people to get a hard-hidding point quickly. In light of the soundbite culture, here’s a collection of humorous statements that hopefully, hit close to home.
- Don’t let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
- Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.
- Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.
- It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
- The good Lord didn’t create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
- When you get to your wit’s end, you’ll find God lives there.
- People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
- Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.
- Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn’t belong.
- If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
- God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
- Some minds are like concrete thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
- Peace starts with a smile.
- I don’t know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?!
- A lot of church members who are singing “Standing on the Promises” are just sitting on the premises.
- We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
- Be ye fishers of men. You catch them; He’ll clean them.
- Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
- Don’t put a question mark where God put a period.
- Don’t wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
- Forbidden fruits create many jams.
- God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called
- God grades on the cross, not the curve.
- God loves everyone, but probably prefers “fruits of the spirit” over “religious nuts!”
- God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
- He who angers you, controls you!
- If God is your co-pilot, swap seats!
- Prayer: The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
- The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
- We don’t change the message, the message changes us.
- You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.
- The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails= 4 given.
